I remember when I was working in a public school when a story about several football players in jeopardy of getting kicked off the team when they were caught skipping class to watch a girl perform sex acts. Parents, many of them women, were up in arms about…wait for it…their sons not being able to play football. Ooookkkk.
A few of my co-workers felt the same way; women whose secret hope was that their sons would “make it” to the NFL, and that their behavior should not be taken that serious. I being the non-Mother in the group said this, “If that were my son, my first question would be, “Wasn’t your blackness supposed to be in class?!” All looked incredulous at my response, many thinking, “Well, she doesn’t have kids; she doesn’t understand.” Really?! Let’s see.
Kids will make mistakes; it’s all a part of growing up. Some will make normal growing pain mistakes; and others will just participate in bad behavior because they have been allowed to: at home, at school; anywhere. It’s like the child who gets laughed at for saying a curse word; they look a little dumbfounded by the laughter. But if no one corrects him or her, he or she will do it again and again – especially when they realize the meaning and impact. By then correction is all but too late.
So to say I feel sorry for the young men who were convicted of rape in Ohio for sexually assaulting an inebriated young girl; I don’t. To say that this young lady who was assaulted should not have been inebriated to the point of unconsciousness is true too. However, somewhere along the way these young people learned that their behavior was “ok”. For all the tears parents are crying I have one question for you, “Were you that blinded by the possibility of your son’s NFL dream that you excused his behavior?” To the parents of the young lady who was inebriated beyond functioning, “Was your daughter being a part of the culture blinded you to the fact she was drinking in this manner?”
As mentioned I am not a parent, but I was raised by 2 great ones…and one thing is certain: THEY DIDN’T PLAY NOR GIVE A DAMN ABOUT WHAT I WANTED TO DO!! Today, they call this child abuse. Yet if there’s one thing that parents did back in the day, they worked hard as to not put all their financial hopes and dreams into young men who they believe stand to make millions; maybe.